It’s Hard Not to Hate You
Oct 12, 2011
It’s Hard Not to Hate You
Author: Valerie Frankel
Hardcover: 256 pages
Publisher: St. Martin's Press (September 13, 2011)
What the Publisher Says:
“The hate in you has got to come out.” After being advised to reduce stress by her doctor, humorist Valerie Frankel realized the biggest source of pressure in her life was maintaining an unflappable easing-going persona. After years of glossing over the negative, Frankel goes on a mission of emotional honesty, vowing to let herself feel and express all the toxic emotions she’d long suppressed or denied: jealousy, rage, greed, envy, impatience, regret. Frankel reveals her personal History of Hate, from mean girls in junior high, selfish boyfriends in her twenties and old professional rivals. Hate stomps through her current life, too, with snobby neighbors, rude cell phone talkers, scary doctors and helicopter moms. Regarding her husband, she asks, “How Do I Hate You? Let Me Count the Ways.” (FYI: There are three.) By the end of her authentic emotional experience, Frankel concludes that toxic emotions are actually good for you. The positive thinkers, aka, The Secret crowd, have it backwards. Trying to ward off negativity was what’d been causing Frankel’s career stagnation, as well as her health and personal problems. With the guidance of celebrity friends like Joan Rivers and psychic Mary T. Browne, Frankel now uses anger, jealousy and impatience as tools to be a better, balanced and deeper person. IT'S HARD NOT TO HATE YOU sends the message that there are no wrong emotions, only wrong ways of dealing with them.
What Idgie Says:
This is an interesting book. It’s a story, but also a life lesson/self help sort of instruction manual on why holding in your anger is unhealthy.
Valarie, at first glance, appears to hate everyone. Girl’s got a lot of hate going on there. A sneering disapproval of most everyone. I’ve known people like that………they get very tiring to be around after a while.
Granted, she was snubbed and laughed at and ignored during her formative school years………but then again so are a lot of kids. She hung on to those feelings into her adulthood until finally, when she receives a diagnosis that is unpleasant to say the least, she fears that between that and her overwhelming dislike of just about everything, she’s going to lose it.
So this book is her journey into finding out how to release the hate. She doesn’t lose any of it, she just learns how to handle it better.
It has moments of humor – if you like the sarcastically biting towards others type of humor. I do tend to enjoy it………in small doses. It does have some helpful lessons learned toward the end that all of us could stand to remember.
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